dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
