Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize