Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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