Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize