Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
