If i come over, it means nothing
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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