Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
