Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
