But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
