hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
you have to choose: penises or morals?
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
