Three words: puerto rican gang bang
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
