R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
Randomize
