I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Screaming "dámelo" at the bottle of scotch was definitely my best and worst moment of Cinco de Mayo 2015.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize