just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
