their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
the liver wants what the liver wants
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Randomize
