i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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