hotel room ftw
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize