I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
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