The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Randomize
