I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
