You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
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