Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
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