this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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