awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
