I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
We are all done wearing pants today
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
