I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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