Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize