I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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