you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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