life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
I currently don't understand fingers.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
