Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
