i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
