are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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