so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
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