gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
