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It's just like the Real World with babies
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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