We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize