Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
