I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
