That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
