But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
