One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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