Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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