Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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