i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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