U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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