69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
