Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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