My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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