I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Every concussion has its silver lining
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
