what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Randomize
