I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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