apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
How external is "for external use only"?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Randomize
